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Why I haven't been on - Printable Version

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Why I haven't been on - Craftin - Sep 21st, 2016

Sorry for the inactivity, I have a perfectly valid excuse.

    So I was on the way back from Newfoundland to my home province when a terrorist pulled out what looked like an Xbox controller with wires sticking out. He took over the plane and forced the pilot to fly to Nunavut which is where I guess he was headed.

      The 1 hour flight turned into a 6 hour flight, so naturally we had to stop for gas along the way. When we landed in Alberta I quickly opened the emergency exit and slid down the long orange slide protruding from the side of the plane. I quickly ran into the terminal knowing the terrorist wouldn't dare follow me in there, and let my family know where I was.

      My parents however are both alcoholics and lost their licenses due to DUI's, so I had to walk home. I met some people along the way, made a few friends and took a few drugs I help with the pain of my aching feet. One man stood out in particular named Jacob, he let me crash at his place for a few days to rest. I would clean up his dump of a place for him in return for shelter, and I stayed there for a weekend.

    Once I had left Jacob's I headed back towards home. At this point I was in Ontario which is still pretty far, my home being in Nova Scotia. I met up with a few First Nations on a reserve in Quispamsis, New Brunswick. I had planned about walking through the forest along the coast for the rest of the way and the Natives taught me how to survive in such a climate, showing me how to make baskets and clay buckets, and even let me take a bow and a few arrows before I left. Little did I know I would need them.

        I was walking along the beach when a sand-shark jumped out of the water and made towards me fast. Remembering the native's lessons I quickly got to high ground and drew my bow, with an arrow at the ready. I let the shark get as close as possible before I let my arrow fly. The arrow struck the many teethed wonder straight in the right eye and it let out this terrible scream that scared a flock of birds on a couple trees just down the beach. I let a final arrow fly that stopped the Sharks final call. I took a few teeth from the shark and continued down the beach.

      After I had washed the blood I'd gotten on my cargo shorts I headed into the forest until I found some sort of road. The road I found was labeled on a sign slightly up the street, and i recognized the trail I was on immediately. I was in Truro, about a 20 minute drive from my house. I walked along the trail until I reached a highway with signs leading me home. I felt like Terry Fox traveling across Canada.

      When I got home I went to join the Minecraft server I missed so dearly, and realized that I had left my laptop in my suitcase on the plane. I immediately realized what I had to do, and went down to the town's library to make resumes. I handed them out to various businesses near my home and got an interview at the Wendy's on Sackville Drive. I worked a few weeks there until I had enough to buy a decent laptop, and here we are today.

I'll be on soon.

Re: Why I haven't been on - masterovieOG - Sep 21st, 2016

^ Kappa

Re: Why I haven't been on - Noxehhh - Sep 21st, 2016

Same dad.

Re: Why I haven't been on - masterovieOG - Sep 21st, 2016

Ok son

Re: Why I haven't been on - b_bob58 - Sep 21st, 2016

I can confirm that this all happened. My name is Jacob, the permanent resident of the humble adobe that I so kindly allowed craftin to rest in. Since this story is so unbelievably difficult for you all to understand, here is a picture of craftin's face that the terrorist somehow managed to capture when he whipped out the controller on the plane.

[Image: ZNK74KK]

Re: Why I haven't been on - b_bob58 - Sep 21st, 2016

[Image: ZNK74KK.jpg]

Re: Why I haven't been on - b_bob58 - Sep 22nd, 2016

Unacceptable.

Re: Why I haven't been on - Jereh - Sep 22nd, 2016

how did a sand shark jump out of water , shouldn't it be on sand... having second thoughts about this story here  FeelsBadMan.jpeg

Re: Why I haven't been on - zs471 - Sep 22nd, 2016

(Sep 21st, 2016, 11:34 AM)b_bob58 link Wrote: [Image: ZNK74KK.jpg]
I can seriously imagine Craftin making this face is a terrorist were to pull out a bomb on his plane.

Re: Why I haven't been on - b_bob58 - Sep 22nd, 2016

(Sep 22nd, 2016, 06:46 AM)zs471 link Wrote: [quote author=b_bob58 link=topic=4243.msg24526#msg24526 date=1474482871]
[Image: ZNK74KK.jpg]
I can seriously imagine Craftin making this face is a terrorist were to pull out a bomb on his plane.
[/quote]

Seriously same. I just felt like quoting this quote so everybody has to see the picture again when they go to recent posts.